Out of town: Day 1 of 22 

Featured photo: sunset from my parents town

I meant to leave town yesterday. I thought I’d be here for my parents 50th wedding anniversary surprise party. Yup. Fail bus. 

I’ve been exhausted. I’ve been trying to veg out, be a touch social and still get all my work done. I’ve been working 14 hour days. Working on the weekends and I’m still not prepared for this coming week. 

I thought I could go to the chiropractor and see my dentist for a check up then drive to my parents town 7 hours away on Friday. Easy peasey. 

Insert failbus. Like a huge tour bus of fail. You see, in order to leave from the dentist meant my work had to be done. It also meant on Thursday my house would need to be cleaned and I would be packed for a weekend at my parents, a week in the office downstate and 2 weeks of car camping/ possible backpacking in conditions from 40 degree mountains to 100 degree valleys.

Wanna know how I spent my Thursday night? Working until 11 pm at night. Yup. Awesome. 

Friday I was called to research more items, take pictures and measurements, send emails, answer phone calls etc. I decided by 4 pm I needed a nap then I could pack and drive. When I woke up at 6 pm I vetoed driving for fear of falling asleep. Suddenly it was 11 pm and I had time warped into the future somehow just by sitting on the couch. Still not packed, I went to bed.  Geared to wake up in 5 hours. 

Of course I laid in bed longer than I should, I debated on what to pack and how and finally crunch time came and went and in a hurricane action I threw stuff in bags, threw it in my car and without looking back I left. 3 hours later than I should have. 

I arrived 2 hours late to my parents party. So far on night one of 22 nights away from home, I already think I forgot to pack my glasses. MY GLASSSES! I’ve got at least one pair of extra contacts for the next 22 days and i do not have decent vision. I can’t drive, I can barely walk without glasses or contacts. Hopefully I threw them in my other bag and quickly searching in the dark I simply missed them. Otherwise I pray my dog sitter can express mail them to me. Ekk.  Not going to lie, I’m freaking out. 

Also, remember my sexting subcontractor? He texted me at 3 am again. I sent him a follow up text saying it was unfair he only texted after bar close and he needed to invite me out for a drink. He replied a few hours later, You’re right. I’ll make it up. 

We spoke several times on Wednesday and Thursday about work. I could hear him smiling on the other line, I enjoyed how he said Hello & Goodbye with my name. How we started just saying Hey when answering the phone and smiling. I’m smitten. Fully smitten with this boy. Now I have to wait 22 days before we’re even in the same town. 

22 days wondering if he’s sexting someone else at 3 am. If he remembers his promise to make it up to me or that I even exist. 

Arggg. He’s really really adorable. 

Some people say they met someone and instantly knew they were going to marry them. That they were going to pursue them until it happened. Sometimes I think that I think that about everyone. But I want to say that about this guy. He’s the bees knees. 

Sigh. It’s dreamy just thinking about him. 

baby steps to Tuesday

Today’s featured image: The sunrise from my backyard this morning.

Human contact. It’s something I never thought would be an issue for me. I grew up extremely shy and hid from the world. When I realized that there was a whole world I wanted to see, or at least a small sliver, I knew I had to face my fear and get out there. Now I can talk to just about anyone. I still get nervous, I’m still shy but it’s a daily battle of what is more important. I love to socialize! The issue now is that I work from home most days. Sometimes I don’t even leave the house except to let my dog out. Even then I just stand in my backyard in my pajamas. I never see people anymore. And yes I have friends but they are all 29/30 and married couples. Many who have adopted me as their third wheel life partner for dinner dates and such, but you don’t meet new people sitting at someone’s home.

Today was no different. But I did adjust my comforter after waking up so I could still claim my bed as being made. You know after you do something 50 zillion times, I hear it becomes a habit. The house is still crazy disorganized mess but baby steps…

My friends are coming up on Thursday, good motivation to finish organizing/cleaning. Tomorrow instead of traveling for work I get to fill in for a co-worker here in my home town… I’m sure I’ll explain my job at some point.

But most importantly today, I used this blog as motivation to hit the gym and be mindful of my diet. Wacky concept I know. I’m the best at procrastination. I’m really great at talking myself out of opportunities but baby steps to healthy choices, right?

Baby Step- Dr Marvin from ‘What About Bob?’ knew what was up! haha I love that movie – and if you haven’t seen it, stop being crazy and watch it. Life Changing.

I’m currently on Weight Watchers and have gained weight because I’m irresponsible. I have a gym membership for over 2 months but tonight was only my second visit. Well, now I’m letting you hold me responsible and I want you to guilt me. Go to the gym… Go outside… Talk to a human face to face!

And then be proud of me, I was on the elliptical for 30 minutes. And while I did contemplate quitting at 15 minutes, then again at 20, 25, 28 and 29, I made it all the way to 30 minutes and not a second more!

I swear I’m not as much of a disaster as I may sound, but I’m here to be honest, and I’ve really got to get myself back together before 38 rolls around in 361 days.

Sunday is for the lazy

Day 3. I woke up around 10 am. Sometime around noon I hauled the broken snowblower out of the shed and through the snow, closer to the deck. I believe the carburetor is the problem, and I have a replacement kit, but I can’t get access. I have a firm belief that a hammer can fix most things, but I still couldn’t get the damn knob off the shifter. I also realized I missed one bolt on the cover – and without a 10 mm crescent wrench – the snowblower is left to sit in the snow, broken for the 2nd year in a row.

I was about to call a friend when I realized how disgusting my house was. Dirty clothes, dirty dishes, just overall disarray. I know the issue, I have depression and I bet a touch of ADD and hoarders complex. Admitting it is the first step to any solution right?
When I realized I’d be too embarrassed to have my friend come in my house, I knew I had to ditch the snowblower project, again, and start cleaning the house.

I started by making my bed. This included dumping all the clean clothes I had dumped there last week onto the floor since I wasn’t sure what was clean or dirty. Then I had to do loads of laundry, which brought me into the bathroom. Here I started organizing the cabinets above the washer and I found 4 empty soap dispensers. I realized I had kept them to use them to refill foaming soap with water and body wash. Whalla, cheap foaming hand soap! The problem is I still have over 20 hand soap pumps full because I went insane buying them during a sale 2 years ago.  See what I mean about being a hoarder? Thankfully I threw all the empty ones away.

From the cabinets I went to under the sink to look for a sponge, instead I organized quickly to find I had over 160 panty liners, multiple boxes of tampons, and more toothpaste and deodorant, shampoo than I ever thought I owned. Mental note: Stop buying things when they are on sale.

From there I bleached down the toilet, scrubbing bubbled the shower, added dishes to the dishwasher and finally went back to make my bed. 5 loads of laundry later I have a made bed but piles of clean laundry on it waiting to be folded. See the ADD pattern – I never quite make it through one task before starting another. This throughout the day leads to nothing seeming to be completed. Everything only half done.

Though I may not have fixed my snowblower, I do have a clean toilet, clean wrinkled clothes, I reattached my closet door that had fallen off last week, and I finally brought in the outdoor christmas decorations that had been sitting by the front door for a few weeks, though they are only sitting in a box on my coffee table… but baby steps, right? I still spent most of the day watching TV. Can you tell what a mess my personal life is yet?

Day 3 of being 37. No exercise. Limited access to the outdoors. No human contact. But clean laundry and a made bed. Better than nothing.